Relationship

Write Letters!

Hi everyone Kathryn here, so it may seem like my last few updates have been all doom and gloom, but for today my advice is guaranteed to put a smile on somebody’s face. * So today my advice is to write letters.

Writing letters is something that me and my boyfriend do when we can’t see each other for weeks on end, we’ll write a letter and then the other will keep it in our bag/ draw/ wherever. So that when we feel down we can read the letter and feel a bit more positive.

Yeah, you may be thinking what’s the point? Stamps, papers, envelops all cost money and surely it’s far easier just to pick up the phone and give them a ring. And the thing is while you can ring and text people sometimes I find that it feels more personal writing a letter. And it means a lot more to the person receiving the letter because they know that you’ve gone to the effort and taken the time to write the letter.

The other positive of writing a letter is that you can keep the letter and treasure it, when my boyfriend sends me letters I’ll put it in a box full of memories. And I know I’ll keep those letters forever.

While I’m talking about writing letters to help cope during long distance, this doesn’t have to be relationship specific, and you could write letters to friends and family and see a smile spread on their face when they open that letter.

So, write a letter and put a smile on somebody’s face, you never know you could be making somebody’s day by writing a letter. And that’s all from me for today, until next time, Kathryn.

* My boyfriend told me that he couldn’t stop smiling after reading the letter.

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Relationship

Why Everyone Is Right When They Say: “Move On Before You Start University”

So today I’m going to talk about romance with University and all that jazz surrounding relationships before University and I’ll start with that little saying: “If you’re in a relationship with a person back home and you’re at Uni, it’s not going to work.”

This is true.

Nine times out of ten you are never going to stay with your secondary/middle/high school partner, and it’s namely down to maturity. You may think you’re the most mature kid at school, but when it comes to love, no one really is. You haven’t seen the world, you’ve been stuck in your home town.

For example, when I left for University, I was in a relationship during my first year and it messed up a lot of chances I had to make friends. You don’t wanna have the embarrassment I did of having to explain to my closest friends at University that “I haven’t told her about you all because I know she doesn’t want me to have other friends”. Which is such a fun convosation.

Okay, so maybe all pre-University relationships aren’t like my previous horror story.

But you still have to be aware of the fact that it simply won’t work. You are now in a new place, a new city, a new country even! You will meet like minded people like you who want to succeed, and like me you will find someone who loves you for who you are, that you can connect to, can go out and enjoy hours and hours of walking around shops and pondering stuff like “What Hogwarts house would the characters from such and such a film be in”.

I look back on my first year with regret. I missed out on a lot of things, meeting new people, I got to a point where I was so afraid to go on Facebook and say I was heading out to meet a friend because I knew that I would have a game of 20 questions over their gender, their close partners, everything!

Even then, regardless of if they are or are not like that, you still end up missing out on a lot of opportunities, one of my first flatmates ended up leaving his course, simply because he missed his girlfriend back home too much and I know that he will one day regret leaving University, because it’s a whole new world.

We missed out on going out with our flatmates, seeing films and going off to different festivals and the like, simply because we were always on the phone, stuck, in an eternal loop of ‘how is so and so from this street.’ We were so holed up in our rooms, we barely got to see our University in all it’s glory.

So my advice is this, and it follows suit with so many other people, like Rhett and Link (also check out their song about graduation, it’s so funny), don’t stay with someone back in your hometown.

It simply isn’t going to work. Tensions will rise because you are off doing revision and they are wanting to talk to you every second and you just can’t. The revision you get for University can’t be treated like a college assignment anymore, it’s a career, something to give you an insight into what you will be doing for the rest of your life. You will also end up being reminded each day of home, and your family. Homesickness is not a nice thing to suffer from, especially during exam season after Christmas. So don’t let someone stop you from that, from enjoying your life, simply because they are not there.

Until next time!
Conor ^-^

Relationship

Have a Routine!

Hi everyone, Kathryn here and my tip of the day is at aimed at couples doing long distance and that is have a routine.

This is loosely based on an episode I recently watched of How I met your Mother. In the episode Victoria gets an offer to go on a culinary course… in Germany. During the episode both Ted and Victoria have to decide whether they should break up and Victoria moves to Germany or stay together in New York.However what irked me is that all the characters in the show seem to think long distance won’t work. (With the exception of Lily who says that the only way she got through long distance was by knowing her soulmate was back in New York).

The thing is long distance can work. I’ve been in a long distance relationship for two and a half months and it’s still going okay. All you need is to be able to trust the other person.

However another thing that I think helps is having a routine. Without really knowing it me and my boyfriend starting a routine when we started look distance.

In the mornings he’ll phone to make sure I’m awake (normally I’m having breakfast and my phone is on silent). Then when I’m getting the bus I’ll text him, and we’ll send a few occasional texts before speaking too each other lunchtime. Then after work we’ll phone again in the evening.

Personally I like having this routine because it makes the distance feel so much shorter when I hear his voice.

It is also important to put in the effort when starting a long distance relationship. The two of us take in turns of visiting each other every two weeks. Remember a relationship is a two way thing and you both need to put in the effort.

So, have a routine and it’ll make your relationship feel more secure and it’ll help make long distance less scary. And that’s all from me for today, until next time, Kathryn.

Relationship

Say No to This!

Hey guys, Kathryn here and first of all sorry that I didn’t update yesterday, instead I’m updating today and Samara will still post later. 

So far there have been quite a few tips on relationships, but they have all been about starting a relationship. Today I’m going to dive deeper and talk about something that will ultimately happen in a relationship: sex.

Whether it’s today, tomorrow or somewhere the conversation leading to it will happen eventually.

(Also side note if your cringing at this then don’t worry I’m probably cringing twice as much while writing this).

And for today’s tip of the day I would advise you: to say no if you’re not ready. (And I wish ‘Say No to This’ from Hamilton hadn’t have just come into my head).

There’s no harm in admitting that you’re not ready, there’s no harm in admitting that things are going to fast for you. Remember you make up 50% of this relationship and it’s important that you are moving at a comfortable pace for both of you.

So if you are worrying that you aren’t ready then say so, say no, if they are the right person for you then they’ll be more happy to wait for you.

And that’s all from me for today, until next time, Kathryn!

Relationship

Installing a Countdown App!

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Whether you want to believe it or not, here’s the cold hard truth: long distance is hard. It’s hard not being able to see that other person 24/7. It’s hard only being able to see them one weekend every four weeks. It’s hard but at the end of the day you just have to find a way to cope and deal with the pain of missing that person.

It’s a hard transition going from seeing that person every day to only seeing them every so often but my tip of the day will (hopefully) make it a little bit easier and that is install a countdown app.
I’ve been in a long distance relationship for about two months now, and it’s hard, even though seeming them again and spending time with them is the best saying goodbye is the worst. And saying goodbye is the hardest part.

While there’s no fast track method to make the pain go away, one way I’ve found that makes saying goodbye slightly easier is by installing a countdown app.

On my phone I’ve installed a countdown app: Days (available on iPhones). On this app I’ve included dates to look forward to, such as seeing my boyfriend again, going to see Elaine Paige with him and my best friend, the end of my IY and the holiday that we’re planning next year.

Plan activities and new experiences to share with that person and give yourself something too look forward too!

Whenever I’m feeling down I will look at this app and remember that it’s not look until I can see him again. And it’s a nice feeling knowing that I have something to look forward to. For instance over the last few weeks, whenever I was feeling down I thought about seeing Grease with my boyfriend.

However I would recommend installing a countdown regardless of whether you’re in a long distance relationship or not. If you’re finding university or a new job hard then it’s a good idea to install a countdown app which contains a list of dates to look forward to.

So on a final note, my tip of the day would be to install a countdown app and give yourself something to look forward too. Until next time! Kathryn.

Relationship

Say Yes to Relationships!

Have you seen that film: “the yes man” with Jim Carey? Well if you haven’t then here’s a brief overview of the film, basically Jim Carey’s character has to say yes to everything no matter how crazy the request is. Although this idea to say yes to everything is good in theory, in principle it’s not realistic: after all you can’t say yes to everything!

So for my advice today is taken from that film (and no it’s not say yes to everything) but say yes to some things if they are going to make you happy, particularly relationships. So say yes when someone asks you out. (Well obviously only say yes if you think you will be happy with them and only if you want to go out with them.)

It can be so easy to say yes, but it can also be so easy to say no especially when it comes to trying something new. Why try something new when you can stay comfortable with the way things are at the minute?

It is very easy to say no when someone asks you out, even though you think you’ll be happy with them. It can often be down to fear of the unknown but if you have been friends with that person for a long time then you could worry that it’ll ruin your friendship.

I myself had doubts when the guy I liked asked me out and I was worried that it would ruin our truly great friendship. But sometimes you just have to take a chance and say yes, after all you’ll never know how it ends until it begins.

But the thing is even if your relationship doesn’t work out, if your friendship is strong enough then you’ll be able to pull through.

So, on a final note my advice for today is take a chance and say yes. After all who knows what will happen once you say yes?

Relationship

Take a Chance with Relationships!

Hi everyone for today’s tip of the day I’m going to give a piece of advice about something that I wish I’d told my friend when I last saw her: and that is take a chance with a relationships. 

I’ve recently been reading ‘How Hard Can Love Be’ by Holly Bourne (highly recommend by the way). And the main character: Amber falls for this American boy Kyle. However she is reluctant to start a long distance relationship because at the end of the summer she’s going back to England. Whilst wondering what to do Amber talks to her best friends Evie and Lottie. And my advice comes from what Lottie says: “if a relationship- no matter how short it is is going to make you happy then you should take a chance.”

And yes, relationships are hard especially if you know that they can either end up being long-distance or in a breakup. But if you don’t take a chance then you’ll never know what it’s like.

Don’t avoid starting a relationship just because you know it’s going to be hard in the long run. Sometimes we just need to live in the present.

So my advice to you would be to take a chance with relationships . If that person makes you happy then it’ll all be worth it in the end.

(Also I would highly recommend reading How Hard Can Love Be? It’s a brilliant read).

Until next time, Kathryn.